Thursday, June 23, 2011

Fleur grew

What's Newton's law again? An object in motion wants to stay in motion?  Yeah.  Something like that.  Well, Fleur's law seems to be that a woman who eats tends to want to keep eating.  And eating.  And eating some more.  

I've been gone from the world-o'-blog for a while, you may have noticed.  :)  I don't have a great excuse.  We didn't move, or have a baby, or lose a close family member (thank goodness to all of that).  My excuse is that I fell off the wagon.  Hard.  And, up until now, I have been ashamed to admit it.  Even to myself.  But I finally stepped onto the scale this morning and forced myself to admit the truth.  I have gained back 30 pounds since January.  "Hi, my name is Fleur.  Hi, Fleur. And I am once again overweight." 
Now, I know that I am the only person in the world to have ever had this problem. wink wink  So, I decided to tell you about it so that if, by some strange coincidence, you might have had, or ever will have this problem, maybe you won't feel quite so alone.  That's what this blog is all about, after all.  Informing the world that not everyone's life is as perfect and easy as you may think.  I have decided to "man up" and not only admit my failure, but also do something about it.  Next week I am going back to Weight Watchers.  I know that the program didn't actually solve my underlying eating problems, but until I get my weight manageable, I am too overwhelmed to try to get to the root of my over-eating.  I will go back to my old meeting, hat in hand, and start over. sigh

This time I want to do it better.  I want to learn to enjoy fruits and veggies as a normal part of life.  I want to snack on healthy things, instead of WW 1 point snack bars that are made from who-knows-what.  I bought a gym membership last week.  I want to use it to build muscle and actually get in shape. 
This is me and my mom at my brother's wedding two weeks ago.  My mom has done fabulous at maintaining her weight loss.  I'm so proud of her!  Doesn't she look great!?  I need to get my inspiration from her. 

In my new spirit of transparency and honesty and accountability, here are my current stats:

30 years old
185 pounds (up from my goal weight of 155)
5' 6"
36% body fat (as measured by my fitness evaluation at the gym)

Bleah.  I can do better than that.  Here's to do-overs.